It’s not always about finding love so much as it is about finding a potential marriage partner who fits with one’s own ideals.
For example, although many men get married without a house and a car, Chinese women will often say that they’re looking for these things because that’s the sort of person who probably has a stable career and will be able to provide for her and their future children in the long-term. As one contestant on China’s most popular dating show put it, "I’d rather cry in a BMW than laugh on a bicycle." Every parent is different, of course, but in general Chinese parents expect to be more involved in their children’s relationships.
My family, on the other hand, has always been against interracial dating.
But after I met him during Chinese New Year, where we bonded over photos I brought of my own family, the tables turned and my guy never heard another discouraging word from his father again.
Sometimes, the ultimate way to get beyond “no” is Got something in common?
I told them, bluntly, that it was my life and my decision, and frankly, I didn't care what they thought. Nor have they ever accepted the concept of me getting married or having kids with someone who isn't white.
Since then, they have mostly been silent about the topic, but it still comes up from time to time. Since D and I are now months into a serious relationship, I knew I had to talk with her about my parents, and their shitty worldview.
” from your non-Asian friends because your favorite food is kimchi, chicken feet, or raw fish?
This is just one of many moments when Asians abroad are suddenly struck with the reality that we are culturally unique.
For a lot of Chinese people, serious dating starts after they’ve finished school.
More so than Westerners, many Chinese view dating as a pragmatic affair.
Our chemistry was so good that, for weeks, I came to work every morning, beaming from bedroom bliss.